Popping the Bubble

How do we get students to step out of their comfort zones and experience new people outside of their circle of friends? This is a struggle in many middle schools.  Many of these students have been together since kindergarten, and kids are pigeon-holed into cliques for the remainder of their schooling.  How many small towns are just like this across the nation?  Students get stuck in their comfort zone, afraid to step away from their safety blanket of friends for fear of how they will be perceived.

We aimed to burst this comfort bubble with the help of our leadership group comprised of 7th and 8th graders, PACK. Mix It Up Day was the perfect venue to shake things up in a cafeteria that had been defined as "exclusive" by these same student leaders.  At first, our leadership team of students was a bit skeptical.  They weren't sure how their classmates would receive the idea.  Some admitted that it would put them in a very uncomfortable situation with their friend groups and they were worried.  My co-advisor, Rachel Dapp, and I helped ease their fears and reminded our PACK leaders that one of their main goals was to create a school climate that was welcoming to all students.  We also let them know that no change is ever made without taking risks and putting yourself out their for potential judement and failure.  We decided it was a risk worth taking and a potential learning experience. 

The students then went to work planning the event that would take place on October 29, 2013. Our PACK youngsters created a lunch wave that would put their classmates in an uncomfortable situation sitting with kids that they normally may not ever speak with.  Groups planned how to randomize seating as students entered the cafeteria.  Another group decorated the cafeteria with color-coded table clothes and a number system.  And yet another group produced a video explaining Mix It Up Day to be played at the beginning of each lunch wave.  Our PACK group was prepared for this event and at go time, the cafeteria was ready and looking great.

I would love to say that everything worked out perfectly, and all students arrived at the cafeteria willing to take risks and converse with new people.  But that would be too easy.  Our leaders did an outstanding job of getting students into the cafeteria and ushering them to their random seats for the day.  Once students found out what was going on, the inevitable questions of "What is this?" and "Why do we have to do this?" sprouted up around the room.  Students were uncomfortable and it showed in their demeanor and in the volume of the cafeteria.  Initially, there were some silent tables, uncomfortable shrugs, and angry glares among the students.  Our PACK members anticipated this and came armed with conversation starters ranging from "Who is your favorite celebrity?" to "What is the most unusual thing you have ever eaten?" to "If you could have a superpower, what would it be?"  Some students opened up and introduced themselves.  Some were reluctant participants while some stayed silent.  Our leaders wandered the cafeteria acting as facilitators trying to keep conversations going and sharing their own experiences and answers.

It was not all high fives, handshakes and uncomfortable conversations.  We learned that we still have a ways to go to popping the bubble surrounding some cliques especially with our 8th graders. Quotes like "There's a reason we don't sit with them" and "I hate this person, why do I have to sit with them?" were reminders that we have a long way to go towards creating a school culture and climate where all students feel welcome.  And while these comments were disheartening, they were good wake-up calls to our students leaders that there is still much work to be done in our school.

Our student leaders felt a sense of fullfilment.  We were extremely proud of the effort and energy that was put into planning and implementing this event. Most importantly, I was proud of the risk our PACK students were willing to take to try to create change in their environment. One of our 7th grade leaders left us with this quote by John Bingham after our last lunch wave, and it couldn't have been more fitting: "The miracle isn't that we finished; it's that we had the courage to start."  

Hopefully, this new courage can be a springboard to affecting change within their social groups.

How does your school go about creating a welcoming environment for all students?